Storytime With Bloody Tom

Tom (*does he or doesn't he?) Gjelten provides a comforting bedtime story of CIA history:

"During the Cold War the United States had one adversary: Soviet Communism. The CIA sent agents around the world to track what the Soviets were up to and to thwart them where possible. But when communism collapsed, the world got more complicated..."

See, those intrepid agents of the CIA weren't doing anything bad; they were keeping us safe by ridding the world of millions of pesky communists in Iran, Indonesia, Vietnam, Guatemala, El Salvador, Afghanistan, etc. And now children, the world has just gotten so much more complicated that all kinds of secret US government agencies are sending their spooks all over the world to spread democracy and protect the Homeland. According to Gjelten, "The proliferation of new intelligence agents overseas has been hard for CIA old-timers who take pride in their intelligence craft and think no one else does it as well." Isn't that so touching? It made me feel all warm and fuzzy and safe and sleepy...zzzzzzzzz.

*Get paid by The Company, that is.